Writings of a Bad Neo-Druid

2003-10-05T14:19:00.000-04:00

The brain does amazing things, doesn't it?
Instructions: Just read the following sentence straight through without
really thinking about it.

Acocdrnig to an elgnsih unviesitry sutdy the oredr of letetrs in a wrod
dosen't mttaer, the olny thnig thta's iopmrantt is that the frsit and lsat
ltteer of eevry word is in the crcreot ptoision. The rset can be jmbueld and
one is stlil able to raed the txet wiohtut dclftfuiiy.

________________________________________________________
Yesterday was happy. Lannie went to work and I fiddled around on her computer a bit, before visiting Gecko for donuts! I also saw Jen and her new boyfriend Jeremy, whom I've met before, but I had to leave shortly after their arrival. We had just enough time to sing The Cheese Song! Then I got on a bus and got to JoAnne Fabrics just as she was getting off work. We walked around the Colonie Center Mall a bit. The Hallmark had a window display of scary animatronic Care Bears, which talked to each other, recognized each other by name, and sang songs in harmony. Better than Furbys, yet cute and frightening all at once. We had pasta at American Diner, and then sat waiting for a bus back to campus. It didn't come.

Finally we went back into the mall and bought some My Little Ponies to cheer us up, since we were getting cold and annoyed with the buses. Returning to the stop again, the bus finally arrived, 10 minutes ahead of schedule (apparently we'd missed the last one) - grrrr....

Once back in the dorm, cold and tired, it was... (intro music please) Anime Time! First we watched a scary mind f*** short called "Cat Soup." - Hello Kitty on a bad acid trip, basically. Then, happy episodes of Hikaru No Go!
______________________________________________________________________________________

2003-10-04T11:22:00.000-04:00

Well it's been awhile since I've posted on this... my Grandfather's house has a computer, but it's the really old type with a pathetic dial-up connection, with AO-Hell of course. So beyond checking my email and dumping the spam every week or so, I don't bother to try much else.

I've been doing well, health-wise and all that. I've become frighteningly domestic since my Grandfather has never had to do anything like cook, clean, do dishes, or laundry. My Grandma handled all of that; so now it's either I do it, or noone does. I've finally signed up for driving lessons, and after the first I've been declared "safe enough for road practice" - I actually surprised myself in that I didn't kill anyone or hit anything, but then the guy tried to get me to parallel park. Hahahaha!

This weekend I'm visiting my J-chan up at Albany - hence my computer access and this blog! (oh how I've missed highspeed connection!) The two of us have been having a great time - watching anime, playing with the new generation of My Little Ponies, planning our My Little Pony webcomic, and our little house in Sugarloaf with a kitty, puppy, basement filled with My Little Pony Collection, and of course the neighboring Alpaca farm, and NeoPagan coven that meets in the apple orchard down the street.... (Hey, I can dream, can't I?)

2003-09-12T02:04:00.000-04:00

Irene Ward passed away quietly at about 5:10am yesterday morning. Those on vigil around her had been snoozing - I think she waited for a moment when noone was paying attention.

I was awoken by my Aunt Sharon's call a few minutes later. She wanted to tell my mother, who was sleeping upstairs. I couldn't wake her while on the phone, (afraid of waking everyone else) but when Sharon agreed to give me a few minutes and call back, my mom, dad and I were all waiting for the ring.

After some discussion, Mom decided to keep my sister's home from school, and they were told when they woke up. The school was called, and I made myself breakfast. Then, tired again (I'm normally not up until 11, yet alone 5:30) I lay down.

I wasn't sure if I'd even fall asleep yet I didn't wake up again until around 2pm. Then I found my parents had left around 8am, my sister's were instructed to wake me if they needed anything. Well... they never tried to wake me, and much to my surprise I slept for 5 hours.

I know people have different coping methods - guess mine is sleeping all day. -_-

Well, the day I missed was not a pleasant one, by all reports. My aunts, uncles, and grandfather went back to the house and tried to make funeral plans. Everyone was upset and angry and there was a lot of bickering and stress. However, in the end, the obituary was written, relatives were called, and a date was set - Monday, Sept. 15.

I packed and arrived at my grandparent's house at 7ish, finding the place crowded but the other relatives cleared out over the next hour or so - everyone has their own business back home to attend to.

So now.... it's just Grandpa and I. It's weird being here again - the house I grew up in. Over the years since I'd moved out - it seemed odd how the place which had been my whole world as a child grew smaller and smaller. Suddenly I found I had to bend down at the bathroom sink instead of reach up. It's even stranger not having Grandma here, I keep expecting her to come around the corner.

I'm still not sure what I'll do tomorrow. I guess just... be here. It's odd, I'm not really sad most of the time, just kinda misplaced.

2003-09-05T04:39:00.000-04:00

Sleepless night number 2196.... nah, I wasn't really keeping count. This is the only time that is mine - and even then it's likely to be interrupted by those with small bladders.

Today was like most others lately, not much planned was accomplished and not much happened but the unexpected. Mom left around 12:30 pm with her sister to go visit Grandma in the hospital, Grandpa and all his kids gathered for a family meeting with the social worker. I guess she IS being sent to a nursing home but since Medicaid is involved, we have little say in where she is sent to.

According to mom, grandma wasn't looking at all good today - unusually low phosphorus, perhaps a side effect of chemo and radiation therapy, knocked her into semi-consciousness and caused scary effects like hallucinations and incoherent speech. There was the fear she wouldn't even make the night - so mom and her sisters stayed on watch all day. A phosphorus IV drip improved things greatly, and mom eventually came home around 12 midnight, but I guess grandma is still somewhat out of it.

Part of me wonders if she'll ever really come-to again. And why are they even bothering with all the radiation and chemo when the cancer has already spread beyond any hope of recovery? Part of me suspects that most of the family members refuse to admit that she's dying, and so want her to continue fighting - and of course the medical employees aren't going to refuse money. But I've seen nursing homes, and of course mom works in one. It's not a place anyone should ever end up.

Then there's poor Grandpa who I think is the most worst off in all of this - he's never been alone before in 50 years. He's filled with regrets and has nothing but time to think about all the should haves, could haves, and would haves. That is all, of course, ridiculous as he was a wonderful companion to his wife. Perfect? of course not... but he tolerated all of grandma's imperfections more than anyone else could have.

I can only hope to be of some help in all of this - from my low rung on the family ladder as granddaughter, mostly all I've done this summer is watch my sisters while my mom was off trying to sort out the family's problems. I'd like to do more. My mother's parents took us both in when we hit rock bottom, I'd like to at least hope I can repay some of that debt.

2003-09-03T03:45:00.000-04:00

well... it's been quite awhile since I've written on this thing. Actually I lost the link to it. (Thanks Marty)
Just finished my SCA conservation internship application, all that's left is to print out the paperwork and send in the part that wasn't electronic.

Now... question is do I keep this blog or start a new one? eh...

2003-03-18T23:19:00.000-05:00

How Could You?

By Jim Willis, 2001

When I was a puppy, I entertained you with my antics and made you laugh. You called me your child, and despite a number of chewed shoes and a couple of murdered throw pillows, I became your best friend.

Whenever I was "bad," you'd shake your finger at me and ask "How could you?" -- but then you'd relent and roll me over for a belly rub.

My housebreaking took a little longer than expected, because you were terribly busy, but we worked on that together. I remember those nights of nuzzling you in bed and listening to your confidences and secret dreams, and I believed that life could not be any more perfect.

We went for long walks and runs in the park, car rides, stops for ice cream (I only got the cone because "ice cream is bad for dogs" you said), and I took long naps in the sun waiting for you to come home at the end of the day.

Gradually, you began spending more time at work and on your career, and more time searching for a human mate. I waited for you patiently, comforted you through heartbreaks and disappointments, never chided you about bad decisions, and romped with glee at your homecomings, and when you fell in love.

She, now your wife, is not a "dog person" -- still I welcomed her into our home, tried to show her affection, and obeyed her. I was happy because you were happy.

Then the human babies came along and I shared your excitement. I was fascinated by their pinkness, how they smelled, and I wanted to mother them, too. Only she and you worried that I might hurt them, and I spent most of my time banished to another room, or to a dog crate. Oh, how I wanted to love them, but I became a prisoner of love."

As they began to grow, I became their friend. They clung to my fur and pulled themselves up on wobbly legs, poked fingers in my eyes, investigated my ears, and gave me kisses on my nose. I loved everything about them and their touch -- because your touch was now so infrequent -- and I would've defended them with my life if need be. I would sneak into their beds and listen to their worries and secret dreams, and together we waited for the sound of your car in the driveway.

There had been a time, when others asked you if you had a dog, that you produced a photo of me from your wallet and told them stories about me. These past few years, you just answered "yes" and changed the subject. I had gone from being "your dog" to "just a dog," and you resented every expenditure on my behalf.

Now, you have a new career opportunity in another city, and you and they will be moving to an apartment that does not allow pets. You've made the right decision for your "family," but there was a time when I was your only family.

I was excited about the car ride until we arrived at the animal shelter. It smelled of dogs and cats, of fear, of hopelessness. You filled out the paperwork and said "I know you will find a good home for her." They shrugged and gave you a pained look. They understand the realities facing a middle-aged dog, even one with "papers."

You had to pry your son's fingers loose from my collar as he screamed, "No, Daddy! Please don't let them take my dog!" And I worried for him, and what lessons you had just taught him about friendship and loyalty, about love and responsibility, and about respect for all life.

You gave me a good-bye pat on the head, avoided my eyes, and politely refused to take my collar and leash with you. You had a deadline to meet and now I have one, too. After you left, the two nice ladies said you probably knew about your upcoming move months ago and made no attempt to find me another good home. They shook their heads and asked "How could you?"

They are as attentive to us here in the shelter as their busy schedules allow. They feed us, of course, but I lost my appetite days ago.

At first, whenever anyone passed my pen, I rushed to the front, hoping it was you that you had changed your mind -- that this was all a bad dream... or I hoped it would at least be someone who cared, anyone who might save me.

When I realized I could not compete with the frolicking for attention of happy puppies, oblivious to their own fate, I retreated to a far corner and waited. I heard her footsteps as she came for me at the end of the day, and I padded along the aisle after her to a separate room. A blissfully quiet room.

She placed me on the table and rubbed my ears, and told me not to worry. My heart pounded in anticipation of what was to come, but there was also a sense of relief. The prisoner of love had run out of days.

As is my nature, I was more concerned about her. The burden which she bears weighs heavily on her, and I know that, the same way I knew your every mood.

She gently placed a tourniquet around my foreleg as a tear ran down her cheek. I licked her hand in the same way I used to comfort you so many years ago.

She expertly slid the hypodermic needle into my vein. As I felt the sting and the cool liquid coursing through my body, I lay down sleepily, looked into her kind eyes and murmured "How could you?"

Perhaps because she understood my dogspeak, she said "I'm so sorry." She hugged me, and hurriedly explained it was her job to make sure I went to a better place, where I wouldn't be ignored or abused or abandoned, or have to fend for myself --a place of love and light so very different from this earthly place.

And with my last bit of energy, I tried to convey to her with a thump of my tail that my "How could you?" was not directed at her. It was directed at you, My Beloved Master, I was thinking of you. I will think of you and wait for you forever. May everyone in your life continue to show you so much loyalty.

A Note from the Author:
If "How Could You?" brought tears to your eyes as you read it, as it did to mine as I wrote it, it is because it is the composite story of the millions of formerly "owned" pets who die each year in American and Canadian animal shelters. Anyone is welcome to distribute the essay for a noncommercial purpose, as long as it is properly attributed with the copyright notice. Please use it to help educate, on your websites, in newsletters, on animal shelter and vet office bulletin boards. Tell the public that the decision to add a pet to the family is an important one for life, that animals deserve our love and sensible care, that finding another appropriate home for your animal is your responsibility and any local humane society or animal welfare league can offer you good advice, and that all life is precious. Please do your part to stop the killing, and encourage all spay and neuter campaigns in order to prevent unwanted animals. Jim Willis

2003-02-24T16:06:00.000-05:00

Lesson of the Day

Don't have blueberry smoothie if planning on any social interaction afterwards.

*cough cough* And in other news.... hmm, looks like no respectable PhD program is going to accept me until Fall 2004. Potential Solutions include... 1) Volunteer for Student Conservation Association at any number of places in the world for a few months. Volunteer slavery for a relevant social cause looks nice on resumes and applications! Perhaps I could help save a rainforest. Defend endangered species. Hey anyone see Gorillas in the Mist? eh... *ponders* ok not a good analogy. 2) Be the pathetic yet classic post-college live-at-home and work-in-retail kid. Don't get me wrong, I love my family... but Binghamton just sucks. Easiest option but least professionally rewarding. or 3) Stay in Albany and go for a Masters degree... hehe, think mommy would kill me if I said I wanted a MA in Sociology? In defense... a masters would provide well-roundedness and expand later teaching potentials.

2003-02-22T23:29:00.000-05:00

I seriously haven't written here in a long time... I guess that old quote is true, what's it say? Something like... "Life is what slips by while you're too busy doing other things." Perhaps I should start a new "diary" someplace else. *pauses to think* ....eh....

Seems anymore I try not to think ahead too much, just take one day, one week at a time. Check the voicemail messages, run by the office and post up any flyers I find there. See what reading assignments are due tomorrow.... do them while working in the peer mentor lounge. Meetings... staff meetings, club meetings, studygroup meetings. Organize trips and programs and speakers. Run out for groceries, get quarters for the laundry.
And Lannie, of course she's a distraction I'll most happily accept! I don't think she realizes how much she cheers me up just by being around. I'm glad that Jenn, Elizabeth, and Karla liked her as well... *smiles* but of course who wouldn't?

Jenn's visit to U.Albany was fun! And it was neat having a roomie for a while, although I think the limited time was enough - Jenn was already starting to pick up my clumsy habits! Still I was able to teach her some important basics about college. Like... don't lean against the walls in the elevator, and chinese delivery is your friend!

2003-02-19T23:41:00.000-05:00

More quizzing... this one had better results!

Tomboy

What's your sexual appeal?
brought to you by Quizilla
You are sexy and utterly irresistable. you can atttract girls, guys, whoever you want. You tend to be loyal, caring and possessive. Please call me, I'll be yours forever.

2003-02-19T23:14:00.000-05:00

FRIGHTENING!

You are a squirrel porn type. You enjoy lots of
fur up top and down below. In fact you went to
college just for those cheeky little squirrels,
they're all Bigger on campus!

What's Your Fetish?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-02-11T23:30:00.000-05:00

Don't ask my why but I found this kinda funny....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Thank you for emailing President Bush. Your ideas and comments are very
important to him.

For up-to-date information about the President and his policies, please check
the White House web site at www.whitehouse.gov.

Unfortunately, because of the large volume of email received, the President
cannot personally respond to each message. However, the White House staff
considers and reports citizen ideas and concerns.

Again, thank you for your email. Your interest in the work of President Bush
and his administration is appreciated.

Sincerely,
The White House Office of E-Correspondence

2003-01-27T18:37:00.000-05:00

This came curtesy of my mom... it fairly accurately describes my changing attitudes to the weather lately....
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

December 8: 6:00 PM.
It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat for hours by the window watching the huge soft flakes drift down from heaven. It looked likea Grandma Moses Print. So romantic we felt like newlyweds again. I love snow!

December 9:
We woke to a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering every inch of the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Can there be a more lovely place in the Whole World? Moving here was the best idea I've ever had. Shoveled for the first time in years, felt like a boy again. I did both our driveway and the sidewalks. This afternoon the snowplow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got toshovel again. What a perfect life.

December 12:
The sun has melted all our lovely snow. Such a disappointment.My neighbor
tells me not to worry, we'll definitely have a white Christmas.No snow on Christmas would be awful! Bob says we'll have so much snow by the end of winter, that I'll never want to see snow again. I don't think that's possible. Bob is such a nice man, I'm glad he's our neighbor.

December 14:
Snow, lovely snow! 8" last night. The temperature dropped to -20. The cold makes everything sparkle so. The wind took my breath away,but I warmed up by shoveling the driveway and sidewalks. This is the life! The snowplow came back this afternoon and buried everything again. I didn't realize I would have to do quite this much shoveling, but I'll certainly get back in shape this way. I wish I wouldn't huff and puff so.

December 15:
20 inches forecast. Sold my van and bought a 4x4 Blazer. Bought snow tires for the wife's car and two extra shovels. Stocked the freezer.The wife wants a wood stove in case the electricity goes out.I think that's silly. We aren't in Alaska, after all.

December 16:
Ice storm this morning.Fell on my ass on the ice in the driveway putting down salt. Hurt like hell. The wife laughed for an hour,which I think was very cruel.

December 17:
Still way below freezing. Roads are too icy to go anywhere. Electricity was off for five hours. I had to pile the blankets on to stay warm. Nothing to do but stare at the wife and try not to irritate her. GuessI should've bought a wood stove, but won't admit it to her. God I hate it when she's right. I can't believe I'm freezing to death in my own living room.

December 20:
Electricity's back on, but had another 14" of the damn stuff last night. More shoveling. Took all day. Snowplow came by twice. Tried to find a neighbor kid to shovel, but they said they're too busy playing hockey. I think they're lying. Called the only hardware store around to see about buying a snow blower, and they're out. Might have another shipment in March. I think they're lying. Bob says I have to shovel or the city will have it done and bill me. I think he's lying.

December 22:
Bob was right about a white Christmas, because 13 more inches of the white shit fell today, and it's so cold it probably won't melt 'til August.Took me 45 minutes to get all dressed up to go out to shovel, and then I had to piss. By the time I got undressed, pissed and dressed again, I was too tired to shovel! Tried to hire Bob, who has a plow on his truck, for the rest of the winter; but he says he's too busy. I think the asshole is lying.

December 23:
Only 2" of snow today, and it warmed up to "0". The wife wanted me to decorate the front of the house this morning. What, is she nuts!!! Why didn't she tell me to do that a month ago? She says she did, but I think she's lying.

December 24:
6". Snow packed so hard by snowplow, I broke the shovel. Thought I was having a heart attack. If I ever catch the son-of-a-bitch who drives thatsnow plow, I'll drag him through the snow by his balls and beat him to death with my broken shovel. I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling and then he comes down the street at a 100 miles an hour and throws snow all over everywhere I've just been. Tonight the wife wanted me to sing Christmas carols with her and open our presents, but I was too busy watching for the snowplow.

December 25:
Merry F$^%*&!@ Christmas. 20 moreinches of the F$^%*&!@ slop tonight. Snowed in.The idea of shoveling makes my blood boil. God, I hate the snow! Then the snow plow driver came by asking for a donation and I hit him over the head with my shovel. The wife says I have a bad attitude. I think she's a fricking idiot. If I have to watch "It's a Wonderful Life" one more time, I'm going to stuff her into the microwave.

December 26:
Still snowed in. Why the hell did I ever move here? It was all HER idea. She's really getting on my nerves.

December 27:
Temperature dropped to -30, and the pipes froze. Plumber came after 14 hours of waiting for him; he only charged me $1,400 to replace all my pipes.

December 28:
Warmed up to above -50. Still snowed in. The BITCH is driving me crazy!!!!!

December 29:
10 more inches. Bob says I have to shovel the roof or it could cave in. That's the silliest thing I ever heard. How dumb does he think I am?

December 30:
Roof caved in. I beat up the snow plow driver. He is now suing me for a million dollars; not for only the beating I gave him, but also for trying to shove the broken snow shovel up his ass. The wife went home to her mother. 9" predicted.

December 31:
I set fire to what's left of the house. No more shoveling.

January 8:
Feel so good. I just love those little white pills they keep giving me. Why am I tied to the bed?

2003-01-24T17:14:00.000-05:00

The First Week Draws to a Close... All told, looks like it will be an interesting semester, at the very least. I like all of my professors, and none of the classes look as if they will be difficult. I had planned to opt one Pass/Fail... but it would appear to do so now would be criminal!
In today's gay/lesbian class... Professor Fetterley read to the class the children's book "Heather Has Two Mommies" (A very politically and ecologically correct book, sorta modern Dick and Jane, controversial of course, but honestly I think it would bore more 4-yr olds... the target audience is more towards gay parents) Then discussed it and later works by the author, two short lesbian love stories.
Yesterday's morning, I arrived late to Delano's Energy and Resources class, due to needing to rush to buy a Lion King ticket this morning, but I wasn't chastized for it. No textbook for his class! No wonder he's a Distinguised Teaching Professor. Looks like the main point of the class will be discussing oil, coal, pollution, politics, and American gluttony... and the many nicer alternatives we could use but don't. Being a Green, I could pass this class in my sleep. My only disapopintment was that he'd already mentioned Osama Bin Laden in the intro. class. *groans* But at least he didn't use the word "evil"...
The theater class is my only wild card this semester: the professor seems the classic haughty "everyone who's not a theater professor is an uncultured pig" type, but thankfully we're reading diversity plays not shakespear. Flipping through them all, I noticed everything from a few NY persona shorts (including a wigger teen wannabe rapper and a neurotic upstate divorcee) to a drama about a gay man with AIDS seeking assisted suicide.
Lastly was Biology of Insects... with a surprisingly large number of students - 50 perhaps. The professor is likable... and she's thankfully modern in her teaching style so we've been spared all the latin taxonimic classification crap. She focuses more on the interesting stuff (Ever see that Extremes show on Discovery Ch?) Term paper will be easy (Haha... I say that now, ask me again the day before it's due)

2003-01-23T18:48:00.000-05:00

Was this just my day or what? I love this Professor already...

~~~~~~~~~copied email~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hi Melissa,

Thank you very much for your e-mail. You're correct. I'll revise the
syllabus accordingly and distribute an accurate one during next
Tuesday's class.

Thanks again for finding this error. I appreciate your efforts, and
will provide an extra 2 points on your semester-average at the end
of the semester for having found this error. Nice going, Melissa.

Best regards,
John Delano

Date sent: Thu, 23 Jan 2003 13:01:18 -0800 (PST)
From: "M. Henneman"
Subject: GEO250 syllabus error
To: jdelano@atmos.albany.edu

>
> Professor Delano,
>
> While putting the semester's exams into my schedulebook, I noted that you
> scheduled Exam #2 during our second Spring Break... Thursday April 17th.
>
> While I myself do not celebrate Passover or Easter, and wouldn't mind that
> day...I'm guessing class attendance would be unusually low.
>
> ~ Melissa Henneman
>
>
>
> ---------------------------------
> Do you Yahoo!?
> Yahoo! Mail Plus - Powerful. Affordable. Sign up now

******************************************
John W. Delano, Ph.D.
Distinguished Teaching Professor
Earth Science 313
Department of Earth and Atmospheric Sciences
The University at Albany (SUNY)
Albany, NY 12222 USA
Office: 518-442-4479 Fax: 518-442-5825
email: jdelano@atmos.albany.edu
http://www.origins.rpi.edu
****************************************
"Aim above morality. Be not simply good; be good for something."
Henry David Thoreau

"If there is no one in your way, it's probably because you're
not going anywhere." Robert F. Kennedy

2003-01-22T23:45:00.000-05:00

Gotta Love QUIZ TIME!

What's your Inner European?
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You Taste Like Chocolate!

Brown.

Sticky.

Yummy in the right places.

What Do *You* Taste Like?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

You Are A Romantic Kisser!

You'll only kiss if the mood is right and if you think you are falling in love.

Some may say you're old fashioned, but when you kiss, you see stars!

One kiss from you, and anyone will be hooked forever.

How Do *You* Kiss?

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You Are a Henna Gaijin!

You're not Japanese, but you wish you were!

You can use chopsticks with your eyes closed, and you've memorized hundreds of Kanji.

You even answer your phone "moshi moshi."

While the number of anime videos you've seen is way higher than the number of dates you've been on, there's hope.

Play the sexy, mysterous gaijin, and you'll have plenty of Japanese meat.

What's *Your* Japanese Subculture?

2003-01-21T18:40:00.000-05:00

It was a record-breaking cold day today with windchill putting the temperature into the negative numbers... so, of course today I went out to get my textbooks! The Albany Bookstore didn't have any for any of my classes (am I surprised?) so I hiked it to Mary Jane's. They had my biology textbook at least, for the low price of $87.25 new, and all the books for my theater class. I had no idea theater classes were so expensive! I figured... a few playbooks right? yeah... try ELEVEN playbooks, totaling to $86.90. I still don't know if books will be required for my Women's studies class or the Geology class

2003-01-21T02:54:00.000-05:00

Finally looked up my grades on the 'net... good news, I'm still an Ubergeek. Semester GPA: 3.85, my highest yet!!! My cumulative is still pretty much unmoved at 3.66 though.

Bio of Birds and Sociology of Gender were both A's... Restoration Ecology and Experimental Ecology were A -'s (a grade not bad enough to whine about... it just leaves a bad aftertaste)

*smiles* All in all, it should be a good final semester. Good classes, and if I'm lucky I can hopefully keep all the clubs I'm in still going, with other work and fun distractions (Lan-chan you're still evil). Grrrrrrr.... why am I still up?

2003-01-19T22:38:00.000-05:00

Flying is the Art of Aiming for the Ground, and Missing From the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, and sounds like a good motto for me at this point. Due to my tendency to procrastinate I'm going to have to trust to dumb luck to get where I hope to be, for as of late I've been aiming at the ground, but I might still miss.

Soo... I ended up spending a lot of time with Mary and Greg. They'll think it silly I know, but I love their little apartment, a small world that doesn't pretend to be perfect, but is still friendly. Plants in every window, wiccan books intermixed with horror novels, two young cats, two aged rats, and a mid-sized iguana with attitude. Slayers, and other black metal CDs, mixed with Greg's many tattoos leave most people with totally wrong assumptions about Greg - it takes a lot for me to say this but I actually like this guy. He cooks, does his share of chores, goes to work at 4am (Gods know how...) and bickers with Mary like they're already an old married couple. He also tolerates me amazingly well... most of Mary's boyfriends don't like the fact that her best friend's a lesbian. Of course the fact that we're practically sisters (thus, eww...) is usually missed by most as well. Greg realized it I think when he came in one evening and Mary and I both, simultaneously, in the same exact tone and timing, said "Welcome Back, Greg!" - evidence perhaps that I'd been spending perhaps a bit too much of my time around there!

2003-01-19T20:25:00.000-05:00

The Final Semester Starts...

Back in U.Albany... after a bit of a delay caused by an angry car, that is. But still things are almost back to normal now... I'm working on the important things, like checking my email and figuring out where to put the new stuff in my room. Oh yes... and this is amusing in a sad way. Ya know the DVD player I got? My television is too old for me to be able to plug in such a device, all it has is a cable hook-up, none of those fancy multi-color thingies. I wonder if RadioShack sells an adapter for such a problem.

Now, a to-do list: sell old textbooks and buy new ones, figure out what my duty days are, check up on upcoming birthdays and things I must attend to, and start looking for a driving school and GRE test date/prep stuff.

2003-01-04T21:36:00.000-05:00

This is all quite suitable:

Your Primary Mythical Creature
Air Types
The main strength of the Air types is intellect. The second element indicates the most probable focus for this intellectual activity.
Unicorn Air with Water Astrologically associated with Gemini and the Third House Unicorn types are very concerned with the communication of ideas. They are witty and likeable but can also be quite shy. They are easily bored and easily distracted, and may seem unpredictable and superficial for this reason. Actually they are very deep and are usually trying to find the connections between the people and things around them. They are highly imaginative but not very practical. They love knowledge for its own sake and are not concerned about putting it to use. They are socially astute and sensitive to others’ feelings, but may still appear somewhat aloof. They are drawn to grand schemes for unifying people but these often don’t extend beyond the initial idea. Very logical and rational, Unicorn types are also unconventional and even bizarre. Other people may regard them as fey or just strange.

Your Shadow Creature
Fire Types
All the Fire types have problems relating to anger and aggression. The weakest element indicates the main focus of these problems.
Phoenix Fire and Earth This shadow is prone to a sense of stagnation due to lack of motivation and laziness. Nothing durable is ever produced. Practical activities may never be embarked upon. There is an underlying sense of futility and hopelessness. Disillusionment results from their lack of confidence that they can change anything for the better, and in any case they do not have the will. At the same time there is an underlying grandiosity and even megalomania reflected in their dreams and aspirations. They need to feel special. Instead, they may simply overindulge or neglect themselves physically. The biggest obstacle of weak Earth is to overcome self-centeredness and greed; the biggest obstacle of weak Fire is to overcome anger and aggression.

2003-01-04T21:32:00.000-05:00

According to the SelectSmart.com Belief System Selector, my #1 belief match is Neo-Pagan.
What do you believe? Visit SelectSmart.com/RELIGION

2002-12-28T02:34:00.000-05:00

Looks like I'm cycling back to my "normal" hours... sleeping in 'till noonish, staying up until 2 or 3am. It's not quite true "night owl" qualities... it's more an avoidance of morning. *smiles* Last summer I did the same, and the only ill effect was I never saw the morning glories blooming.

Anyways... there was a point to this post, really. *pauses to think* ahh yes... the christmas spoils:
A DVD player, with 2 DVDs --Lord of the Rings Collector's Edition and Star Wars: Attack of the Clones, a Gameboy Advance with 4 games -- Zelda, Dinotopia, Masters of the Universe(Y'all remember He-Man?), and of course, Lord of the Rings. A plush sparrow that sings it's proper song when squeezed (Kawaii!) and a Dinotopia egg #12 with a beanie dinosaur baby inside. A Scorchio plushie.(a Neopet) Fleece pajamas with a blue stars and moon pattern, that are very soft and I'm currently wearing, 2 sweaters and a long sleeve shirt. Cow slipper socks! A dragon pendant and lizard earrings (I like them... might wear them if I'm in a fem mood), a chakra necklace with 7 stones, a desktop fountain with a light in the bottom (my stone collection will go in it quite nicely), incense which I cannot identify but I like it anyways, a new dorm multi-directional lamp and matching desklamp, and 2 of those small Hallmark songbird figures like the Bluebird one Mary gave me last year that I liked so much, with the display tree. (Now I've GOT to get the whole set of 12!!!) The new ones are the Blue Tit and the MeadowLark.

"Quietus" by Vivian Schilling, a horror book, what I've read so far is ok. A vegetarian cookbook (hehe). A "micropet" - a tiny robotic cat able to sit on just 2 fingertips, looks like it might be a good anti-class-boredom toy. Chocolates, including truffles, my favorite. A giant tin of carmel corn, with a matching jigsaw puzzle. "Scarlet's Walk", the newest Tori CD. Two playstation games-- Star Wars, attack of the clones, and Eternal Eyes, an RPG. A small ceramic basket with ceramic birds perched on it, one of those things that are cute but you have no clue of what to do with... and 4 ceramic birds similar to those on the basket, perhaps I'll put them inside it. I also got a ceramic Chinese Dragon statue, but the head needs to be reattached with superglue. Finally, in no particular order: CK One perfume, some new beads for my hair, silly putty, and a new toothbrush!

Have I mentioned yet that my parents always go a little overboard on the christmas present thing?

2002-12-21T02:03:00.000-05:00

2am... baka, I should be sleeping.

2002-12-20T20:47:00.000-05:00

Well this will probably be my last post for awhile... I'm headed off to winter break soon, and little PC time.
I was on duty last night, my "final" duty of the semester, then I volunteered for tonight as well. (No, this wasn't another selfless act... my boss bribed me with saying I'd have one less weekend duty next semester. ^_^) Don't let me forget that next semester Raphie owe's me a duty day, and I work one less weekend duty too.

Finals have been over for awhile now, so I've been mostly doing my own thing, worshipping the television and internet gods, missing Lan.... (I've noone to call and irritate!) This is the first finals period I've ever had where I didn't go crazy with last-minute cram-for-test stress. I've discovered a new free computer game, it's an internet RPG, kinda like a chat room with a 3D world your character can walk around in. (This might be BAD for next semester's productivity...)

I also finished all my xmas shopping *cringes* yes... it entailed going to the dreaded Mall from Hell. But hey, hopefully it will be worth it when all my friends and family open their gifts! (And if they're not happy? Screw it!)

Now... off to go do duty rounds, and then pack to leave tomorrow....

2002-12-14T23:39:00.000-05:00

The Residential Department of UAlbany should have as a motto: "You don't have to be mad to work here, but it helps."

I was origionally supposed to work this monday, but, I switched with Nkosi for this past wednesday, and then through a confusing act of selflessness (See 12/10) I ended up switching wednesday for a weekend saturday/sunday duty with Raphie. Mebbe it's the fact that I seem to be the only one around here without much of a life to get in the way of being stuck here on duty. Or perhaps Raphie just looks too damn good running around all the time in her track&field spandex for me to give in to just about anything.... or mebbe I'm just nice. Anyways, it's good to have people around who owe you one. ^_^

Anyways, yes it's the last weekend of the semester, and I'm the one who gets to play The Bitch to all the drunken freshmen trying to get one last hurrah in before they have to explain their debt and academic probation to their parents. Gotta love my job.

In other news... eh, other news will have to wait for later. Getting called out....

2002-12-10T19:39:00.000-05:00

Which Dysfunctional Care Bear Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

2002-12-10T02:22:00.000-05:00

Ya ever wonder why people say the things about you that they do? At a recent staff meeting in which all were forced to describe their co-workers (nicely) I was dubbed "selfless and honest". Honest, I won't argue with... my nickname might as well be "Glass" for as good as I am at hiding things, therefore I'm always honest by default. It's less of a higher-morality thing than more of a necessity, but generally I don't care about the reactions of other's to my opinion enough to hide stuff anyways. But selfless? eh... I wonder what prompted that. Sure, I care about the planet, environment, and animals more than most, and I'll give advice if asked and try to prevent others from making too many stupid mistakes, but I don't usually go out of my way to help mankind. Since most people don't care about much other than their own species, how'd I end up being labeled as selfless???

Why I wonder about these things at 2am is another matter entirely....

2002-12-10T01:43:00.000-05:00

Normally I don't remember dreams, but this one is up there on the weirdness scale, even for me... so I managed to remember it long enough to write it down.

Weird Dream: I'm in a car with my parents, driving around a lake that has giant shrimp in it, 4-5 feet long each, moving about in schools near the surface. Then, (as happens in dreams) we're out of the car, on the lakeshore, while my mom is out in a small motorboat catching the giant shrimp with a suitably giant fishtank-styled fishnet. Back on shore again, she takes her catch to the car, only now the shrimp have turned to giant fish, 4-feet long greyish generic fish of no particular type. She's putting them into the trunk of the car, but since they're flopping around so much, it's difficult, when the trunk is closed the whole car shakes with their jumping around in there. Dad moves the car closer, before the trunk pops open again and some "escape" and start to flop back down the bank to the water. I go after these escapees (Why? who knows...) and grab one by the gills, carrying it back to the car all the while hoping I won't be bitten. Remember, big fish... with potentially big teeth, probably doesn't want to go back into the trunk of the car. So, once they're all flopping around in the car again, they're covered in blankets (Again, no clue why) and the trunk is closed again. That's it, end of the dream.

Like I said, weird. No, I hadn't seen anything about fish or shrimp on tv lately and I wasn't craving seafood. This is one of those dreams that I'm not even going to touch, analysis ways... perhaps it was random misfiring of the synapses in my brain. Anything else, I'm not sure I want to know.

2002-12-05T01:45:00.000-05:00

If I were a Springer-Verlag Graduate Text in Mathematics, I would be Frank Warner's Foundations of Differentiable Manifolds and Lie Groups.

I give a clear, detailed, and careful development of the basic facts on manifold theory and Lie Groups. I include differentiable manifolds, tensors and differentiable forms. Lie groups and homogenous spaces, integration on manifolds, and in addition provide a proof of the de Rham theorem via sheaf cohomology theory, and develop the local theory of elliptic operators culminating in a proof of the Hodge theorem. Those interested in any of the diverse areas of mathematics requiring the notion of a differentiable manifold will find me extremely useful.

Which Springer GTM would you be? href="http://www.math.mcgill.ca/~dsavitt/GTM.html">The Springer GTM
Test

2002-12-03T16:04:00.000-05:00

>_< it is COLD outside! 17 degrees according to yahoo, feels like 1 degree. I get an ice cream headache just by stepping outside!

2002-12-02T19:09:00.000-05:00

Praise Allah, Neptune, Gaia, or whoever.. my computer is up and running again. (Ok, this did not involve an act of any gods but rather my aunt and her friend Stu.) **goes and dedicates a small shrine to Stu**

The harddrive had died, had to be replaced... very annoying. But the good news is I basically have a brand new computer again! Merry Christmas to me, early.

Ok, a little catching up... while in Binghamton I did not visit any friends or relatives, but I did get out with my family. We did some xmas shopping and saw Harry Potter 2. (In my opinion, the first one was better, but I did like the actor who played "Ron" he did a good job.) I discovered that most of my family was picking out their own presents, so like the ethics cop that I am, I promptly joined in. ***Proudly shows off her duckie-slippersocks*** I also met the newest family critter, an albino cockatiel named Angel. (My sister Jill has this thing for all-white animals) She's still working on the flying thing, currently runs right into walls, but she seems to be a tough little birdie, and very cuddly!
Now, I'm back in Albany for the final stretch of the semester. Term papers are EVIL and why do all the GOOD movies come out at this time of the year, when I have the least time to see them???

2002-11-27T00:21:00.000-05:00

Heading Home for Thanksgiving Soon

Last day in Albany... still need to finish packing, of course. Luckily I WAS able to get the books I needed from the science library tonight before it closed. Well, ok, I couldn't check them out - but I'll bring them back! *innocent smile*

Have to be up to help with closing at 8 AM... an ungodly hour to be awake. Why did I volunteer to do this again? Oh right, because I'm stuck here anyways... Well, here's to a hopefully snow-free ride down to Binghamton.

To do while I'm home: CHARGE banner for the campus center, Restoration Ecology Term Paper, and Experimental Ecology final lab report. There's also the sociology final the day after I get back to Albany, but I'm opting to take that during final's week instead. *sighs* so... it won't be much of a break. But hey, at least I'll get to see the family and the animals! (and by animals I don't mean my sisters...)

2002-11-25T20:59:00.000-05:00

Subject: Management Lessons not learned in college

Lesson #1:

A crow was sitting in a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw the
crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?"
The crow answered, "Sure, why not?" So, the rabbit sat on the ground
below the crow and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the
rabbit and ate it.

Management #1: To sit and do nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.

************************************************
Lesson #2:

A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top
of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy." "Well, why
don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed
with nutrients."

The turkey pecked at a lump of shit and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some
more shit, he reached the second branch. Finally, after the fourth day, there he
was proudly perched at the top of the tree.

Soon he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.

Management Lesson #2: Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.

************************************************
Lesson #3:

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and fell
to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and took
a dump on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow crap, it began to
realize how warm it was. The poop was actually thawing him out! He lay
there all warm and happy and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard
the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat
discovered the bird under the pile of cow shit and promptly dug him out
and ate him!

Management Lesson #3:
(1) Not everyone who drops shit on you is your enemy.
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
(3) And when you're in deep shit, keep your mouth shut.
Class dismissed.

2002-11-25T13:02:00.000-05:00

Dear Friends.

I have been watching you very closely to see if you have been good this year and since you have I will be telling my elves to make some goodies for me to leave under your tree at Christmas.

I was going to bring you

All gifts from the 12 days of Christmas, but we had a little problem. The 12 fiddlers fiddling have all come down with VD from fiddling with the 10 ladies dancing, the 11 lords leaping have knocked up the 8 maidsa-milking, and the 9 pipers piping have been arrested for doing weird things to the 7swans a-swimming. The 6 geese a-laying, 4 calling birds, 3 French hens, 2 turtle doves and the partridge in a pear tree have me up to my sledrunners in bird shit.

On top of all this Mrs. Claus is going through menopause, 8 of my reindeer are in heat, the elves have joined the gay liberation and some people who can't read a calendar have scheduled Christmas for the 5th of January.

Maybe next year I will be able to get my shit together and bring you the things you want. This year I suggest you get your asses down to Wal-Mart before everything is gone.

Sincerely,

Santa Claus

2002-11-25T12:58:00.000-05:00

Ack, insane-busy time of the year, I'll likely not post here very often...
Weekend was fun, went to Friday's with Lan for lunch on Friday (how appropriate)... on the way there, we saw a huge tom turkey just chillin under a tree in someone's backyard right next to Fuller Road. The bird barely noticed our presence, it was sitting just 30 feet from the busy road. Living in suburbia is one way to avoid hunters, I guess.

Saturday, crossgates mall and a movie.. "The Ring", it was somewhat like Sixth Sense, only even weirder (Yes it's possible!) The beginning was so "teen horror flick" it was funny, but got better as it went on. One of those non-endings however that are annoying. Mall was very crowded, so didn't stick around there long.

Sunday, brunch and indoor rock-climbing for 3 hours. Novel experience, good exercise (It's monday now and damn am I sore...) Too many little kids running all over the place. Monkey brats! They had an indoor cave-system you could climb around in as well, I tried it... not for the claustrophobic. DARK and narrow... have to contort your body in all sorts of unusual directions to fit through, up, down, sideways - I'm fairly small for an adult and even I thought I was stuck a few times. Would have been a fun challenge if I hadn't had to keep backtracking to let kids past me. Might I recommend the place have an "adult swim" or something?

Then after returning from that, a quickie dinner before preparing for my evening program, showing the movie "Pi" for the Presidential Scholars. I was co-host, basically my job was to get the room, the pres. scholars did everything else... and it's amazing how much food can be procured when one's not limited by reslife funding! It was very successful, and many folks stayed until 10pm playing Go. (an asian boardgame played in the movie)

Now... rushing to finish graphs and data analysis for ecology lab. I have a headcold - probably caught it on the bus, or at the mall.

2002-11-20T22:12:00.000-05:00

>
1. IF YOU COULD BUILD A HOUSE ANYWHERE, WHERE WOULD IT BE?
On a forested hill, in the country, a round, 2-floor earth-home (built underground except for the southern side) with passive solar heating and a super-efficient fireplace in the center, for the cold days... (Yes, I've given this thought before)
>
2. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE ARTICLE OF CLOTHING?
um... socks. Socks are a great invention.

3. FAVORITE PHYSICAL FEATURE OF THE OPPOSITE SEX?
*coughs* heterosexist quiz...
>
4. WHAT'S THE LAST CD THAT YOU BOUGHT?
i don't recall... but it was probably by Tori Amos
>
5. WHERE'S YOUR FAVORITE PLACE TO BE?
Middle of Nowhere in the Catskills forest, surrounded by giant trees, thigh-high ferns, and absolutely NO man-made noises.
>
6. WHERE'S YOUR LEAST FAVORITE PLACE TO BE?
hmm... a roman catholic church, probably. Never been in one, but I bet it wouldn't be pleasant.
>
7. FAVORITE PLACE TO BE MASSAGED?
neck.....
>
8. WHAT'S MOST IMPORTANT, STRONG IN MIND OR STRONG IN BODY?
Mind... of course, that's the answer a nerd like me would give....>
9. WHAT TIME DO YOU WAKE IN THE MORNING?
9am if I have class... if I don't... noonish...
10. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE KITCHEN APPLIANCE?
coffee maker... it's good for making tea, coffee, instant mix drinks, oatmeal....
>
11. WHAT MAKES YOU REALLY ANGRY?
injustice
>
12. IF YOU COULD PLAY ANY INSTRUMENT, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
um...bagpipes? since I have no musical talent, but w/ bagpipes it doesn't matter
>
13. FAVORITE COLOR?
green! or blue, or black. But not black and blue>
14. Which do you prefer, sports car or SUV?
electric-hybrid fuel-efficient cars are sexy...
>
15. DO YOU BELIEVE IN AFTERLIFE?
no, I believe in pro-choice.

16. FAVORITE CHILDREN'S BOOK?
The Last Unicorn, by Peter Beagle
>
17. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON ?
Spring/early summer, before it gets too hot or buggy.
>
18. WHAT'S YOUR LEAST FAVORITE HOUSEHOLD CHORE?
dishes...
>
19. IF YOU COULD HAVE ONE SUPER POWER, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
shapeshifting...
>
20. IF YOU HAVE A TATTOO, WHAT IS IT?
tribal lizard on my shoulder...

21. CAN YOU JUGGLE?
well... I can try, ok I guess not!
>
22. THE ONE PERSON FROM YOUR PAST YOU WISH YOU COULD GO BACK AND TALK WITH?
Dustin, the kid who picked on me in 4th grade. I'd talk to him, and then beat him into a pulp.
23. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE DAY?
saturday
>
24. WHAT'S IN THE TRUNK OF YOUR CAR?
I don't know... but it sure bangs around a lot.

25. FAVORITE DRINK? Hot chocolate!

26. # OF PEOPLE ON YOUR BUDDY LIST... um... 50? I don't know

27. DO YOU BLOG? yup

28. YOUR FAVORATE VACATION SPOT? never really gone on vacations before

29. IS HOME WHERE YOU GROW UP OR WHERE YOU WANT TO BE? wherever I end up

30. BRUISES OR HICKEYS? ummm.... *grin*

31. FAVORITE ETHNICITY OF FOOD: Indian (veggie foods!)

32. PONYTAILS OR PIGTAILS? my hair's too short for either...

33. HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR NAILS? short, simple and not-messed-around-with thanks

34. KNOW ANYONE WITH A FETISH? yup

35. WHAT IS IT? asian girls...

36. WHAT'S YOURS? like I'd just tell you!

37. WHICH DO YOU PREFER, SUSHI OR HAMBURGER?
sushi... even though i am a vegitarian

38. FROM THE PEOPLE YOU EMAILED THIS TO, WHO'S MOST
LIKELY TO RESPOND?
moot point... I"m not emailing it

39. WHO'S LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
see above

40. DO YOU NEED TO CHANGE YOUR PANTS?
nope... I'm a college student, jeans last at least 2 days.

2002-11-19T23:00:00.000-05:00

--- Bad Night, Good Day ---

Well, full moon has had even stranger effects on me this month than usual. Last night, trying to go to sleep, ended up crying for an hour or instead. I know, I know... how disgustingly "girly"... well, it wasn't like I could control it... it felt like someone had died. Perhaps it was me... Ack, won't go there. Anyways, Why crying??? not sure myself

Today has been great however... I've had this huge burst of energy. I've figured out a way to write one term paper for two classes, or two very similar ones at least... (Shhh... don't tell my professors!) The two classes? Biology of birds, and restoration ecology. The paper is going to be on the stopover habitats of migrating neotropical birds, their migration behavior, and implications for restoration. Also, I actually agreed to let the other members of my group work on the sociology project. Then, I went on a cleaning frenzy, and even finished FOUR loads of laundry before 10 pm! Those who know me will understand the shockingness of that statement! Of course this doesn't mean my room is actually CLEAN yet, but it's much improved.

In other news, it's been rainy/snowy and just in general WET weather lately... although not enough to get me any snow days. Evidently the stormclouds are on the same schedule as most 9 to 5ers... they're usually on business elsewhere, and only hang around here on weekends, or in the evening.

2002-11-17T18:52:00.000-05:00

A good Quote:
"Destiny is not in the stars but in ourselves."
~ William Shakespeare

A funny Quote:
"Relationships are hard. It's like a full time job, and we should treat it like one. If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to leave you, they should give you two weeks' notice. There should be severance pay, and before they leave you, they should have to find you a temp."
~ Bob Ettinger

2002-11-16T16:06:00.000-05:00

Graduate School Blog

Alright, I know some folks are probably getting sick of all this grad. school business but this is my method of thinking "aloud" if you will...
Here's a list of potentials, yes it's long, but in the context of every possible graduate school in the country, I've narrowed down the selection dramatically. I decided to aim for Ecology Departments, since that's the central focus of most of my other interests... behavioral ecology, restoration ecology, etc... There are a lot of "big names" on this list - this is based on two main points: 1) PhD students don't pay tuition, they get assistantships/fellowships and are paid to be there, and 2) The better the school the better the chances of a PhD getting you somewhere in life. I'm going on the perhaps misplaced assumption my professor's seem to have that I can get into any graduate program I choose. I am not quite THAT big-headed, but hell... why not try.

*side note* I apologize beforehand for slaughtering some of these college names, I can't spell, ok?

Top Schools: Cornell, NY (my mom's favorite - close to home), Berkeley University of California, University of Georgia at Athens, Duke University

Almost-Top Schools: University of California at Davis, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, University of Minnesota, Dartmouth (New Hampshire), and University of Wisconsin at Madison.

Nearly-Top Schools: University of California, Santa Barbara (Bren), Lincoln Nebraska, University of Nevada at Reno (don't laugh..)

Ok, that's 12... In the end I'll probably apply to 5 or 6.

2002-11-13T20:54:00.000-05:00

Strange Day, Strange People :

You ever meet someone who could be YOU, in a few years, and the utter shocking truth of it left you speechless? When the woman stopped me and out eyes met, an alarm went off somewhere in my head but I wasn't sure why. It was her intensity that put me on guard, for I recognized it as my own, but multiplied by 2 or 2,000.

She was white, about my height, slim, and her dark hair was cropped simply, close to the head like mine. I wondered briefly if she was a lesbian, and single, but the alarm in my head and the rough guess of her age being around 30 warned me away from that track of thought.

She said she'd noticed the pins on my bag, and wanted to see them. It's not often I am chased down by total strangers, usually if it happens they're selling something, like religion. But I obliged her, displaying my bag in front of me, holding it out like someone inspecting a roll of fabric, or perhaps a girlscout displaying her badges. Gazing at the buttons myself, I made some explanation about being the activist type.
She said she was “that type” too, and used to be quite the liberal PETA member, joining in protests and rescues, breaking into labs. That’s how she’d gotten her daughter, who was 18 now. My mind, slowed by her intensity, and very little sleep, struggled with the daughter concept – she didn’t look THAT old! “You’re daughter?” I asked, confused.
She explained that Faelden was a rescued kitten, an tiny thing when found, an abandoned Scottish fold. She was now 12 pounds, diabetic, and showed me a picture she kept in her wallet. Then it hit me… this woman’s cat was the center of her life. Her “daughter” – not quite a healthy concept, but a familiar one. Again I recognized myself in her. This was the living version of one of my greatest fears of the future: Myself, a bit crazier than I am now but not nearly enough, still alone, my life devoted to animals, only a cat or dog companion. My seclusive nature, the eccentricities of a hermit, may one day drive away all of those who ever cared for me, provided of course I do not run away from them first. Yet of course, I would always have animals – I could never be without them. All they ask is care and attention, they do not lie or judge.

I’d met myself, if my love life never turns out right. A PhD student from Alaska. Perhaps the intensity of her eyes is a common trait in Alaska, as I recall similar eyes in a movie. “Salmonberries” was a strange independent film, a lesbian story set in Alaska. Perhaps I should go there myself. People have commented before on the intensity of my own gaze, it frightens them at times.

Her comment on rescued animals, and the sick things some people do to them, thoughtlessly, reminded me of Lindsey, president of the campus animal right’s group, SETA. I told her of the club, which not surprisingly she’d never heard of. I said I was a member, but since it only a small educational group, it could not be too liberal in animal rights activism. Since I myself am also in the biology department, I must take care not to be blacklisted too badly. She gave me her name and number, and I promised to get back to her with the upcoming group events and future meeting times. She said her life was busy, but she’d try to attend.

Walking away, I realized she must have thought I acted strangely, just as much if not more so as I’d found her strange. I then wondered if perhaps she’d seen herself in me, as well? Perhaps the shock had been mutual.

2002-11-13T05:35:00.000-05:00

MY PAPER IS FINALLLY DONE!!!! WHOOO HOOOO!

Ano... being up at this hour and so overly-tired makes me a little more insane than usual. *laughing at nothing in particular*

tomorrow (or technically today's) goal? Sleep!

What Completely Usless Object in a College Dorm are you?
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2002-11-13T01:48:00.000-05:00

What Kind of Were-Animal Are You?
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2002-11-13T00:44:00.000-05:00

Rainy Days... I don't mind the rain, it makes the air smell cleaner, for a little while at least.
Life has been well, lately. My ecology professor, Dr. Kleppel, singled me out during class as one of the brightest students that really "gets it". He asked if I'd do a particularly empirical section of the final lab report, the result of the class's field trips and associated data collection. I was surpised that he picked me - given over half of my classmates are graduate students. (I wonder what they thought of that!) I agreed to do it, hope I'm not getting myself into too much, and wondered upon his reasons for picking me the rest of the day. My conclusion: he's still buttering me up in hopes that I'll stay at Albany post-graduation and go into his Master's program. Admittedly, that was my origional plan, as it is a good program. Just two problems. I've already taken most of the interesting biology classes for undergraduate credit, so for a Master's I'd either have to take the same classes over for graduate credit or go into other classes which are less in my field of interest, and the program does not offer a PhD option.

I haven't decided for sure upon going for a PhD, but it seems to make the most sense. Master's programs are shorter, but they tend to be more specialized, focusing on a particular career after completion, and Master's students are not given nearly as much financial aid, fellowships, or scholarships as PhD students are. Also, with a PhD I have the option to stay in academia and teach (People have said I'm eccentric enough to make an excellent professor.) or I can seek a suitable "real world" job and start off even higher up on the pay/status scale.

Also, and yes I'll admit to this... there is still a part of me that just wants to have a "Dr." in front of my name. ^_~

2002-11-10T22:04:00.000-05:00

Duty was non-eventful, apparently the freshmen have wisened up a bit, enough to get caught less often at least. All-Staff meeting was as pointless as ever. Why the ice-breaker had to involve a banana is beyond me... Dragon City disappointed me, they messed up the food order, no tofu. Eh... I'm whining again aren't I?

Let me try to think of something happy to talk about... .... .... .....

.... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... ... ... .... .... .... ... .... .... ....damn.

2002-11-08T17:40:00.000-05:00

Friday... no classes, slept in until 11:45am. ^_^

Decided to hit the computer lab before going to anime showing... yes, I decided to go to the anime club instead of the LARP roleplay, because even roleplaying involves too much social interaction for me right now. I'm on duty Saturday, and have a take-home test due for Experimental Ecology on Monday, so I probably won't be writing much here anytime soon. Not much to report on anyways.... computer is still broken, and oh, saw a Kingfisher. Ok, that's it. Laters all.

2002-11-07T22:42:00.000-05:00

quizzing again...

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	High
Schizoid:	High
Schizotypal:	Moderate
Antisocial:	Low
Borderline:	Low
Histrionic:	Low
Narcissistic:	Moderate
Avoidant:	Moderate
Dependent:	Low
Obsessive-Compulsive:	Moderate
-- Click Here To Take The Test --

2002-11-07T22:32:00.000-05:00

well folks, I'm afraid I've got bad news... my computer is very very sick.
It has beepitis. This means, whenever I turn it on, all it does is beep. Nothing on the screen, no loading of Windows. Not even a "no signal" message. Just a beep, a somewhat angry beep that sounds a bit like a fire alarm. I've tried fixing it, having plugged out and back in again everything I could find to plug, even opened up the CPU herself and checked for any loose connections or smoking motherboards. Nada. It wasn't even dusty inside! (Don't ask me how it stayed so clean in there... I have no clue, the rest of my room has an exponentially-growing population of dustbunnies)
I have NO CLUE what's wrong. Those I've asked (who either know more about computers than me or think they do) say it's probably a hardware problem. *screams in agony* This is, pardon the term, shitty.

2002-11-04T00:43:00.000-05:00

Tarot reading today... it was accurate, but not very helpful. I picked the Page of Coins for my signifier, and used the celtic cross method. (How suitable for a druid!) I'm not going to say the question, but it's fairly self-evident.

The card at the center of the cross, represents the core or central issue of the situation: Six of Staves - Victory: Triumph over great difficulties. How suitable for graduation.

The card at the top of the cross represents the atmosphere surrounding the central issue, a force supporting it, or an element in collision with it: Two of Cups - Love (reversed): Separation. Dissolution. Unhappy love. I think "lame duck" applies well here.

The card at the bottom of the cross represents a shallow level of awareness or surface appearance. Five of Staves - Strife: A project or adventure abandoned or cut short because of the departure or disappearance of a necessary colleague, partner, friend or lieutenant. I think most of those around here just think I'm still pissed over the latest break-up. Ha, if it were only that.

The card at the left of the cross represents a deeper level of understanding or underlying meaning: Seven of Swords - Futility. I refer to an earlier posting - 'nuff said, this card and the next one scared me.

The past or things to be released: Nine of Coins - Gain (reversed): Stormy relationships. Unstable circumstances. Unseasonable activity.

The card at the right of the cross represents the future or things to be embraced. Page of Staves (reversed): An unstable, indecisive and perhaps malicious person. A heartbreaker, gossiper, or bringer of bad news. Not sure what this means, but it isn't good....

The card at the base of the staff represents you and your role in the situation. Six of Swords - Science (reversed): A bluff. Deceptive show of force. A desperate attempt to impress. Given how I'm supposed to be selling myself to the highest bidder (be it a company or a college) - suitable.

The card second from the bottom of the staff represents the person, group, or environment that you are interacting with. Seven of Staves - Valor (reversed): Embarrassment. Missed opportunities. Hesitation resulting in predicament. *coughcoughGRE'scoughcough*

The card second from the top of the staff represents hopes, fears, or an unexpected element that will come into play. Two of Coins - Change (reversed): Admirable flexibility. Agility. Expertise. I'm clueless as to the meaning of this one but hey, it's supposed to be a surprise right? Sounds like a good one at least.

The card at the top of the staff represents the ultimate outcome of the situation. The World: Completion and perfection. Focus. Synthesis. Interweaving. The vast design of nature. The interconnecting patterns of experience. Fulfillment and success. Soooo.... the ultimate outcome of my question is I get the world. Gee wiz, that's good! Now my only question is - How???

2002-11-03T01:37:00.000-05:00

Overnight Forecast: "Partly cloudy. A chance of snow showers or flurries through a little after midnight. Lows in the mid 20s. South wind 10 mph becoming northwest. Chance of snow 30 percent."

It's snowing!!!!!!!!!!!! ^_^ I feel a bit better now.

2002-11-03T00:46:00.000-05:00

Uneventfully, another saturday passes. I fear all the concrete and flourescent lighting around here has finally sucked the life out of me. It doesn't help that there's no moon. Detachment.
Not even the frickin television can hold my attention. I shouldn't think so much, it reduces the general population to lab mice running on squeaky metal wheels. It's hard to have a conversation with lab mice, perhaps that's why I rarely leave my room. Why bother?
Wow, anyone who reads this is really going to think I'm losing it. But I wouldn't call this depression, for that too requires a passion that I lack. I seriously need to find a way to get my initiative back. Some sense of importance...

*sips her tea and decides to post before she thinks better of it*

2002-11-01T16:29:00.000-05:00

ATTACK OF THE LADYBUGS! Soon the freshmen of the tower will be freaking out over the annual ladybug plague that attacks the dorms. They cover the outside of the buildings, and get into the inside, trapped in the elevators, and even into bedrooms! I had a theory they were seeking warmth as it got colder, turns out I'm right! (anyone surprised? no) The link is to a site I found that talks about this weirdness...

2002-11-01T16:16:00.000-05:00

My Spring '03 Class Schedule

Energy and Resources, a 200-level geology course Tues & Thurs. from 9:45-11:05am.

The Insects, a 300-level biology course Tues & Thurs. from 4:15-5:35pm

Voices of Diversity in Contemporary American Theater and Drama, a 200-level Theater course Tues & Thurs at 2:30-3:50 pm

Into. to Lesbian/Gay Studies, a 200-level women's studies course Mon.Wed.Fri's at 1:25-2:20pm

The geology course was recommended to me, it is taught by Professor Delano, recipient of the distinguished teacher's award, which basically means he's too good to teach at a state college for very long... and the class fits with my environmental studies theme.

The insect course is taught by a funny little woman in the biology department. I spoke with her about the class and she's a concept-teacher not a memorize-dumb-pointless-facts teacher, so it sound be interesting. I'm taking it for 2 main reasons: I've already taken every other Ecology/Zoology course this college offers, and as most people could attest, I like bugs. I'm also curious to see what other weirdo's sign up for an entomology course.

The theater and women's studies courses are non-academic tangents, essentially just to say I've had a them. Easy A's, probably, but if not I'll just take them pass/fail.
That's it folks - 4 classes, none of them senior-level, and 12 credits, for my final college semester. Too bad I'm not the party-type because this semester is easy as cake. But then, I only "needed" 6 more credits to graduate, and I'm done with every requirement, so why not have a little fun last semester?
Figures that by the time you understand the college system, you're graduating. -_-

2002-10-31T23:20:00.000-05:00

Halloween night... all the freshmen are dressing up to go out and get trashed. Actually, some of them are quite cute this year. One of my residents is "Quail Man" - you know, from that Nickelodeon cartoon Doug? Complete with tighty-wighty underwear outside the shorts, and the belt on his head. I've also seen a terminator, two gynocologists, two catholic girls who I mistakenly thought were supposed to be Britney Spears (same difference!) and of course your various punks, faeries, vampires, and guys in drag.

I of course, am not up to anything, other than bugging whomever I can find to bug. You know, if folks don't want me around I wish they'd just frickin say it - I respect blatant honesty, not half-assed excuses. It's funny the way people act when they're telling themselves to try to be nice. Ok, done ranting, for now at least... goodnight, all. And happy new year!

2002-10-31T01:07:00.000-05:00

Goodnight!

A dreamer is your type. Seen as "not quite there", you see things that few do. You make people think, and your friends turn to you for insight.

A different quiz, what strange type of person are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

2002-10-31T00:48:00.000-05:00

Which Personality Disorder Do You Have?
brought to you by Quizilla

2002-10-31T00:21:00.000-05:00

BASICS
1.What is your FULL name(Miss Muffet is NOT an acceptable answer):Miss
Muffet(Melissa Sue Henneman - and please spare me the hick jokes)

2.What color is YOUR toothbrush(by your I don't mean your cat's): *blinks and goes to look* it's blue and transparent-white, kinda futuristic, probably supposed to impress... it worked, I bought it after all....

3.Who are your Best Friends of the SAME gender: Mary, be default since I've known her so freakin long... and um... others, really!

4. Who are your Best Friends of the OPPOSITE gender(by opposite I do not mean
black is white and butt is...nevermind): bah, easy answer... CJ aka "Tenchi" - although I'll admit I've been talking a lot to Marty lately, for a guy especially. But don't get too hopeful mom.

5.Do You Like Mirrors(remember I am not asking if THEY like you- if they
choose to break it is their decision): mirrors are highly overrated, although useful at times. Like when you've got something in your eye. Although this brings up a good question - why do people need to look in the mirror to brush their teeth? I do it, I'm sure you do it... but does anyone really know WHY???

6. Do You have a pet(s) and if so what is it and what is it(s) name: Mammals: nikki, matrix, sidney, pixie, karma, Birds: buddy, and angel, Crustaceans: digit, and company, and a few assorted fish and amphibians, which come and go too quickly for me to keep track of names.

7. Are you...Male or Female(I just had to ask):Female, last time I checked. Wait... *gropes, yelps, and slaps* nope, still am.

Favorites
What is your favorite...
8.#(in english please): um... 42, 69, and 3.

9.Band/Singer...Nevermind- no one cares

10.Music(acceptable answers are NOT as following...Monkey Breath, Dog
Shugar,or Fly Poop):Dog Breath, Fly Shugar, and Monkey Poop

11.Animal(yes humans are animals and no you may not answer this question with
one): don't have a favorite - although I'll admit I'm partial to things with fur, feathers, and/or scales.

12. Color(Tinky Winky is NOT a color): I have a tinky winky...(why did that sound dirty?) um... anyways, probably green and blue or black. But not black and blue.

13.Perfection or Imperfection(basically does it HAVE to be just right or can
it be human and have it's flaws): to avoid a lenghty philosophical discourse - NO

14. (For the Girls)Candy or Flowers(As we see it- Fattening or
Flattering):: I like plants, but prefer them living to chopped off plant genitals. What's that look for? Um... but chocolate is always good too. Damn hormones

15. (For the Guys)A girl: Cute or Hot(Meaning are you- Sweet or a Chauvanist
Pig): I'll answer this one too... BOTH! which makes me a sweet pig I guess.

16.Geek or Jerk(ooo- that's a toughie): I prefer the term "Gifted" thanks. *looks annoyed then goes back to watching star trek*

17.Potatoes or FRENCH FRIES(no when I say French I do not mean tongue,
nudity, or a french fry something down below): Geez, they wreck all the fun.... ok fine, POTATOES. Ya happy now? Did I kill anyone with boredom? Baka! x_x

The Lil Extra Questions To End This Thing

18.Do You Like... PINOCCIO!!!(whatever you say, you're LYING!): No I'm jealous of him. Where is MY blue fairy dammit?

19. Is Your Toothbrush the Same Color it was before this survey started(if
not I suggest you tell your sis/bro/mom/dad that you've been using their
toothbrush): well since it's TRANSPARENT it now is kinda tannish from sitting on my desk...

20.Are you glad this survey is over: nah, still bored

~*~*~*~*~*~*~
*~* BONUS*~* Did You Like This Survey MORE than all "those other surveys": why are you?
~*~*~*~*~*~*~

2002-10-29T21:12:00.000-05:00

Song of the moment: You Learn - by Alanis Morissette

Phrase of the moment: Thou shalt not date freshmen!

Happy thought: 92 on my sociology of gender midterm... ^_^

Not Happy thought: Need to work on research papers. -_-

Distraction of the week: CHARGE programs. So far I've been to two, homophobia, and greek culture. Eclectic mix, no?

2002-10-24T20:28:00.000-04:00

Yet more proof that I'm really a guy...

What type of manga are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
you are "shonen". all male. all the time. (if you're a girl and you got this i suggest you get some estrogen).

2002-10-24T19:00:00.000-04:00

Thursday evening... after late duty rounds that ended after 12 midnight, about 4 hours of sleep, a biology midterm, and a paper handed in late, I am sitting here again sipping hot chai tea with cinnamon.
Ahhhh, the simple things in life.

The only question of the moment is should I see what's on tv, take a nap, or continue to mess around on the computer? Sure... I should be worried about other things right now, but it's chill out time.

In a few hours I'll head up to the penthouse to support my fellow staff members in their program - a lady from the college psychiatry center educating college students about sex. Not that I need the knowledge, not only do I know more about safe sex than most gay men, I don't get any anyways. But perhaps I can convince a few of my freshmen residents to go with me, there they can get their own condoms, and save me the job of distributor.

2002-10-24T02:42:00.000-04:00

I've been doing a lot of online quiz thingies lately... they are excellent procrastination tools when studying.

What Type Of Anime Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Are you a sex fiend?
brought to you by Quizilla

2002-10-22T23:54:00.000-04:00

A GREEN Dragon Lies Beneath!

I took the Inner Dragon online quiz and found out I am a Green Dragon on the inside. My Inner Dragon is the embodiment of Nature and the Earth. Greens spend almost all of their time below the canopy or just above the treetops in tropical rain forests. Not a bad life considering every other creature in the forest looks up to me, figuratively and literally. I speak the language of every animal and plant in my domain and know most of them by first name. If people mess with my forests, I'm more than happy to wail on their puny butts. Because of my protector/caretaker role, I am the Earth Elemental dragon.

Naturally my whole life pretty much revolves around the other couple million species I keep an eye on, but that's not my whole dragon. I also like to like to impose my steadfast will on others, commune with Nature, and lobby governments for alternative fuels and conservation. My favorable attributes are gemstones, mountains, caves, soil, respect, endurance, responsibility, prosperity, and purpose in life. Folks shouldn't get the idea I'm a hippy pushover though, because my breath weapon is a nasty Fire/Acid combination. Maybe I should invest in a hemp shirt reading "Don't knock my smock, or I'll clean your clock." *wink*

2002-10-22T22:59:00.000-04:00

The Past Week....

Midterms. 'nuff said

Although as usual, in the face of emotional breakdown my grades somehow improve. So now that my ornithology class hates me for ruining the curve, and I managed to "bomb" my first restoration ecology exam with a 94%. I barely studied.

Sometimes, I even scare myself.

In other news, I've decided that there's no way in hell I'm staying in Albany for grad school. Great, right? So that just leaves the rest of the world for me to decide upon... oh yeah, and I have to figure out next semester's classes soon. Like, before registration next week. Insects sounds like an interesting class... and after that I'll be able to say I learned about the birds and the bees in college! *cheesy grin* Other than that... perhaps an acting class? After all, soon I'll have to pretend I actually know what I'm doing.

2002-10-22T22:49:00.000-04:00

Well, it's been awhile since I've last written here... mainly because the internet-access has been extremely slow lately. Today it's a bit better, probably because the vast majority of the student population seemed to have the same exact idea as I did today - time to do laundry. *sighs*

I think it all started when last Wednesday, it rained ALL DAY. The weather was so bad nobody left their rooms, which resulted in an unusually large number of alcohol busts and way too many Kazaa music downloads. Now, the alcohol busts were over by the end of the night, but the Kazaa downloads kept on pluggin for the next 4-5 days. (With bandwith limitations it takes that long for so many thousand people to download 20 songs each...)

2002-10-14T13:14:00.000-04:00

Wanted: non-smoking female, of healthy mind and body (or relatively so at least), preferably vegetarian, early 20s, with a fondness for nature and animals, a good sense of humor, and future plans beyond which bar they're going to visit next weekend. Should not desire a life of domestic servitude or have a need for reproduction and childcare, however the ability to cook and clean up after herself is a bonus.
Selected individual will be part of a two-person team, providing services of basic emotional support and general cooperative actions regarding personal, career-related, and financial survival, with occassional requests for physical intimacy. Time-based increases in trust funds will be related to increased access to shared company property and services. Potental applicants may request further information or send resumes to: psychoduckie25@yahoo.com

2002-10-14T12:29:00.000-04:00

I've finally found the real reason I'm tired... I'm overworked.
The population of this country is 237 million. 104 million are retired.
That leaves 133 million to do the work. There are 85
million in school, which leave 48 million to do the work.
Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal
government. This leaves 19 million to do the work.
Four million are in the Armed Forces, which leaves 15 million to do the work. Take from the total the 14,800,000 people who work for State and City Government and that leaves 200,000 to do the work.
There are, on average, 188,000 ill and in hospitals, so that leaves 12,000 to do the work.
Now, there are 11,998 people in Prisons. That leaves just two people to do the work. You and me.
And you're sitting there screwin' around on the internet!

This was taken, without permission, from an AIM away message, which itself I'm sure, was taken without permission from an email or something... so don't accuse me of plagurism, since I wasn't the first person who stole it!

2002-10-13T16:30:00.000-04:00

A continuation of cute internet pet thingies... this one in tribute to the family's pet cockatiel, Buddy... who over the weekend decided that the top of my head was his favorite place to be.

Name = Buddy!

Gender = Male

Age = 1 year old!

Height = 7 inches tall

Weight = 0.1 pounds

Adopt One Yourself @
Chelsea's Petpet Adoption Center

2002-10-03T21:02:00.000-04:00

This reminds me of my gothic phase in highschool.... ok, I was never THIS gothic, but the attitude was defintely there...

Oh yeah, and one of my nicknames in highschool was "Daria" due to my cynicism and lack of enthusiasm for gym class.... hehehe

2002-10-03T20:15:00.000-04:00

Ok, here's the link for anyone who remembers what they are, or just wants to know how crazy I am... My Little Ponies!!!

2002-10-03T20:09:00.000-04:00

My word for Wednesday is: Blah.... I attempted to write a blog, and then blogger.com messed up the posting, so when I lost the copy on the ump-teenth attempt to post, I was too irritated to re-type the whole thing.
Basically it was a blah day... the only thing of note was one freshmen made a comment that My Little Ponies were evil. My origional post went into my discussion on that statement, but since then I've lost interest. Let's just say, I collect MLPs, they are NOT evil, but they may be communist, and leave it at that!

Today went ok, although it was a long day. The professor for the Pre-Health Project Renaissance English class that I am an assistant in called at 10 PM last night and asked if I'd teach the class without him. I led the class discussion of the book they'd just finished, or had supposed to finish at least. It went fairly well... altough my residents tried to bail out of class early. ^_~ The second class took me a bit more seriously, perhaps because I wasn't their RA. Biology of Birds met in a laboratory room today, the professor decided that in his discussion of feathers he needed real avain corpses as teaching aids. Perhaps it's just me, but it seemed rather unnecessary. I attended the class, but felt that all of the concepts and statements he went over could have been taught with pictures or drawings for visual aid, and didn't need real birds. I also lost a bit of respect for him when he started throwing around the dead birds like footballs. ***sighs*** But anyways, I told him of my opinion at the end of class, respectfully, so now I'm one of "those people" in his point of view. Screw him.

Restoration Ecology was as dull as ever... most of my attention during class was focused on the girl to my right, who had a 5-day old kitten with her, which she had rescued and was raising on a formula diet (Meaning she had to carry the kitten with her constantly to feed it every hour) Pardon me for falling into baby talk for a minute but... He was suuuch a cuuutte widdle thing!!!!!!! With his widdle folded ears and eyes still closed, soft fuzzy black and white fur, and pink widdle paws!!!!!!!!!!! Ok, I'm done.

Sociology of gender isn't worth mentioning... no quiz today though, yippee! Then it was off to sign language class. I've now learned the alphabet, and how to say such basic things as "My name is... " and "What are you doing?"... of course, I can't understand anyone's answers yet.

2002-10-01T19:05:00.000-04:00

Well the week is going along about as normally as my weeks go....

Monday's highlight was mucking around in Indian Quad Pond with my ecology lab class. We walked down into the phragmites, which is a thick marsh grass around 8-10 feet high (if I have to guess) It was a very Jurassic feeling, walking through that wall of grass. I kept wondering when the predatory dinosaur was going to jump out at us, that or the Viet Cong. But I was less concerned with Bouncing Bettys than I was with the deep sticky muck beneath the flimsy layer of dead grass stems. Not that I don't mind mud, but one wrong step, and my foot would sink in deep enough I'd probably lose my boot!

Luckily, nothing that dramatic happened, and I successfully cut out my 3-foot square sample of plants without getting bitten by anything or sinking into the mire. Actually the only creature I had direct contact with was a woolybear caterpillar, who somehow found his way onto my leg, and he was merely cute.

Today has been, well... tuesday, what more can I say? Discussing object poetry and the evils of standardized testing in english class, to bird wings and feather classifications in ornithology, to the day ending with a discussion on whether or not female strippers are supporting the passive genderized female role as a sex object. *yawns* ho hum....

In any case, I'm keeping up with my classes. At least as well as the professors, which of late have been a bit lax on the grading of papers and the timely distribution of reading materials. But who's complaining?

2002-09-29T13:29:00.000-04:00

Sunday's To Do List: Laundry, Clean Room, Homework, get organized for the coming week, call grandparents, go for a walk, feed the birds, rescue abandoned kitten, and save the world from humanity.
Probably, I will only achieve perhaps two of those things, but hey, it's good to set goals.

Today I was awakened by some young lady who called my cell and asked for Jake. Now, of course, since I was only half-awake and didn't know who jake was, all I did was mumble, "Wrong number..." and hang up. Had I been thinking clearer, I would have said "Yes, Jake is here, but he's still sleeping after such a hard workout I gave him last night, so don't call back bitch he's mine!"...*evil grin*... just to mess w/ her. But at least the call woke me up before noon for once.
Oh and to those who commented... glad to know my "PMS entry" amused you. ^_^

2002-09-28T17:06:00.000-04:00

I have returned, and damn... does it SUCK to be female right this instant. Ok, let me correct that, I am NOT a transsexual, I do not want to be a male, but my body and I are having that little "fertility debate" again. See... I don't want kids, I don't need kids, and I don't need the annoying and messy bodily processes involved in the maintenance of kid-producing organs. So, I like being female, I just don't need that whole fertility thing. Normally my body and soul get along in this regard, but every now and again some "normal" female hangs around me long enough to remind my body of what it's "supposed" to be doing. Cursed pheremones.
Oh and to any males who are reading this and cringing - I have a habit of speaking my mind regardless of whether or not it offends you, so tough luck. If you can talk about your penis, and whatever bizarre ooze is leaking from it, then I can talk about my own problems, got it? *steps back and reads over*... wow, can we say PMS? sorry folks.

2002-09-28T13:51:00.000-04:00

Goodmorning!
Well, Adam the Great SA called and woke me up at 12ish looking for peeps to go to brunch with. After I realized I'd been dreaming about making websites with kitty-cats on them (DONT ASK) I decided perhaps sleep was overrated. The only staff down in the cafeteria were the other losers like me who did not go to Karen's wedding.
Now... what to do with the day? Laundry, is the obvious choice... alas, I left my detergent in the laundry room two weeks ago! I highly doubt it's still there. Ok, next option - a trip to the local source for cheap plastic crap, and college necessities - Walmart. *cringes* Hopefully I can find someone to go w/ me....
*smiles* Amanda is awesome! Ok, I'm off... wish me luck.

2002-09-28T06:45:00.000-04:00

Goodnight!

After fiddling around with this new source of endless confusion for far too long, the only semi-productive thing was add some links to Neopets, another good procrastination tool. I've noticed the sun came up again without my notice. Time for creatures of the night such as myself to hide under the pillows.

2002-09-28T05:54:00.000-04:00

A bit of background info:

I'm a 21 years old, a womyn, Aquarius, caucasian,
a college student, a biology major and sociology minor,
a peer mentor and RA, a thinker, idealist, activist, and scientist,
a vegetarian, nature-freak, and outdoorsperson,
a druidic neopagan (supposedly)...
who's constantly striving to live by my beliefs,
who's patient and stubburn, fiercly independent, a loner by nature
but a loyal friend and lover to those who earn my trust.

2002-09-28T02:56:00.000-04:00

Ok, this is it... my first entry on an online journal. By the gods, look at what I've fallen down to. Anyways... yeah, I'm often up at the these early hours of the day, seems the only time I ever really think. Procrastination can lead to some interesting things, looks like this is another one. Perhaps with writing, or technically, typing, I can make some sense of my mind. Hell, complete sentences are a step forward!